Working at Resting

 She watches over the affairs of her household and does not eat the bread of idleness. Proverbs 31:27

Lately, I've been really struggling with my priorities. Just like right now I should be cleaning or doing something important but I really feel the need to post this. Thanks to @nataliecreates over on Instagram with her Question of the Day: How do you prioritize self-care? or her blog Natalie Creates I really felt the need to talk about this.

I feel like I'm always trying to get my priorities in check or in balance. I know what they are and what order they come in but actually keeping it balanced all the time is a struggle. I don't think I am alone in this but in my mind I feel like I am. I feel like I'm the only one who doesn't have it together, no where near together. But thanks to Natalie's post I am reminded once more that most people don't have it together and if you think they do, there are probably other areas you don't see that they struggle with.

The older I get though the more comfortable I am getting with "things just are the way they are". I'm doing the best I can, to keep my family happy, me happy and sane. The house is just always going to be in a perpetual mess as long as I have a 3 year old and 16 month old trashing it. That's the way it's supposed to be right? Messy house means happy kids or so I'm told. There are days when I wake up and once diapers are changed and breakfast is doled out, usually whatever self-feeding food we have around I will just start cleaning. I won't shower or usually even change my clothes. I just clean clean clean, then the afternoon comes and I realize I stink, look horrible and feel horrible and the house still isn't the way I would like it and the areas that are nice won't be like that in a couple of hours. There are days when I feel like not even trying. The only area I really work on daily is the kitchen and without a dishwasher and no help it really is a chore. How did they do it back in the day? I realize they didn't have several electronics and blogs pulling them this way and that but I've tried days with no phone, computer or TV and it's still a huge struggle. The Greatest Generation is my favorite generation though I'm not a part of it but sometimes they make me feel bad. Not their fault and I'm sure there were plenty of families back then that didn't have it all together, you just don't see that on TV or in photos.

This post isn't about giving up though or feeling bad about things. It's just about sharing the truth and stating that I'm not giving up but I'm also not striving for perfection. It's about the fact that I can rest in Him and He doesn't care if my house is messy. He's that best friend that will come over for coffee amongst all of the mess and really talk about real things. He will rest my soul and remind me that all I need to focus on is Him and all else will fall into place.

"Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest".  Matthew 11:28

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