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Showing posts with label How He Loves Us. Show all posts
Showing posts with label How He Loves Us. Show all posts

bind my heart

bind my heart to the holy interests of that unseen world. - DOPP, John Baillie



S. Blessed are they that have not seen, and yet have believed. John 20:29 - Streams in the Dessert Aug. 31

O. Sometimes God has to keep away encouraging results until we learn to trust without them.

A. I have to learn to look away from myself and trust God alone and then I will see that what God promises He will perform.

P. Father God, help me to put you first. Help me to put all of my trust in you. You will help me do things I thought impossible. Help me believe! Amen.

This fall is going to be full of things I would have thought impossible 5, 3, 1 year(s) ago. The biggest of which is I will be helping co-lead a mom's group at my church and I have to share my story in front of the women in a couple of weeks. At this point I don't even know what that story is or really how to summarize it. Accepting this role has brought about many emotions I didn't know were there. I feel beyond blessed to have even been considered for such a role but then it brings up all of those voices inside my head of how unworthy I am. So I wanted to stop by here today and share what I'm going through. The truth is, is that God has put me here for a reason it is not by mistake or coincidence, now I pray that I believe He will get me through and help me not continually beat myself up and doubt myself along the way. I am so grateful for the moms that have come along side me and that is one of my biggest reasons for being a part of this mom's group. Praying for a year of  meaningful togetherness, growth and support....and that I can figure out what I should talk about and that it makes sense!


 




Pray, Pray and then Pray again.



Here I am o Lord, here my prayer.


Change is on the horizon with the ever creeping fall season. We decided months ago that Hannah would be going to public school this fall and with that brings much change. The house will be missing two little feet running around all day, it will be quieter and both of us will gain a little breathing room in different aspects.

Danny will still be at home and I'm looking forward to spending some one on one time with him. I just realized that I got to have Hannah to myself up until she was two and now I get to have Danny for two years to myself until he heads off to Kindergarten.

I'm trying to spend this time preparing for the fall, reflecting on how far we've come, soaking up the summer with these little precious people and peaking over the horizon to what is next.

Change is coming as it always is and all I can do is pray...pray pray pray.

The Delight of a Quiet Radical


Surely then you will find delight in the Almighty and will lift up your face to God. Job 22:26

Learning to live in grace is bringing more delight than I could have ever imagined.
Embracing the path that God has chosen for my life has brought peace, assurance and clarity.
I was searching for what was right in front of me the whole time. Looking for some way to serve other than what was laid before me. You are where you are for a reason, God does not make mistakes.
Opening my heart to God, sharing my desires, asking for guidance and being willing to go his way has made all of the difference in the world.

For me it was realizing that my ministry was in my home with my little ones. To lead them to Christ through our special time together daily. My time will come when I am supposed to be out of the home, but that is for another season. I had been struggling with this for a while and I was completely oblivious of the task I had before me. God has blessed me with a very special lady in my life who told me to read the blog post that she just wrote about this very subject.

God used my dear friends words to speak right to my heart, open my eyes and allow me to embrace this season rather than fight it. It's funny, even though we planned on starting a family, made a way for me to stay home and agreed to homeschool, there was still part of me that was fighting this whole season. I got sucked into the everyday mundane and didn't really see any delight in what I was doing. I had lost sight that what I was doing could be the most important thing I do in my life. God had already been working on my heart and through Joy's post he helped me see the truth and find purpose. 

I realized that I am a quiet radical doing my part right now for God's kingdom. I am part of a movement, some might only see as wiping noses, bottoms and messes as I did before, but I've learned that it is a movement that can make a big difference in the future. I'm learning to find delight in these everyday tasks of this very short season. I'm on a mission, I'm part of a movement, I am a quiet radical! 

Will you make your declaration and join me in the movement?


Confidence...



For you have been my hope, O Sovereign Lord, my confidence since my youth. From birth I have relied on you. 
Psalm 71:5-6

Confidence is something I've always struggled with. It's funny because if there is a situation where I'm caught off guard and have to be confident I will be and be fine with it. But if there is something that I need to be confident for in the future I will struggle with self doubt up until the moment arrives, during the moment and then tear myself apart afterwards, telling myself how I should have handled things differently.

Self doubt is super ugly, it is the enemy doing what he does best. It is a quick and easy way to isolation. Which is another thing I've dealt with for the past few years. But through diligent prayer God has seen my hearts desire and has slowly started opening doors for me. I put my trust and hope in Him; and by doing so I've caught myself many times saying that I would never have thought I would be where I am, doing what I'm doing, thinking what I'm thinking and surrounding myself with the people that I am. It has only been through God's grace, mercy and true love for me that I can say these things.

The only way that I have confidence is through Him, He is my strength. My confidence comes from the hope that I find in Him, through trying to have an eternal perspective. Not that it's always easy and I get side tracked alot but it is what I have to come back to, the truth. 

The confidence I speak of isn't me telling myself I'm so awesome, look great or feel better than others. It is a confidence to face my fears, to live everyday with His new mercies, to know His love and kindness, to know that I do deserve these things and finally the biggest thing I'm learning is to show these to others without fear of rejection. I guess, the confidence to be vulnerable. Though it might be scary; to do it anyways, knowing that God is there, He has my back, He is my confidence.

O Lord God Almighty, who is like you? You are mighty, O Lord, and your faithfulness surrounds you.
  Psalm 89:8

Daily Bread



I have hidden your word in my heart that I might not sin against you. Psalm 119:11


This is such a great verse because it reminds me of how important it is to read and study the Bible. It is our instruction manual for life, our daily bread.

Daily Bread, The Word,
The Good Book, 
The Bible

Whatever you want to call it, I NEED it.

 The more I immerse myself in the Word, the closer I feel to God. The closer I feel to God, the more Christlike I want to be. Not as in being perfect, but as in loving, compassionate, patient, gracious, obedient, joyful, kind, understanding, etc. Things I have majorly lacked in through the years, and I mean majorly. I wish this wasn't true but it is. I know I will still sin but the hope is that I will be more conscious of what I'm doing. To take my thoughts captive. The main goal is to hopefully break the chains that bind me to my sin, even if it a little at a time. I just keep trying. I know I will never be perfect and that is not what I'm aiming for....just better than what I was before. Thank you God, for your new mercies every morning and for redeeming me.

I just recently read James 1:13-15 which explains that once desire is conceived, it gives birth to sin; and sin, when it is full grown, gives birth to death. Unfortunately I am a sinner born into a broken world that's why I need God's grace through Christ. That's why I need my Bible to navigate my journey.

Tot School / Letter B & More Creation Story

Tot School


We used another couple of weeks to go over the letter B activities and books. The activities that Hannah worked on this week were counting bears, a magnetic 3D puzzle that I picked up a yard sale for $1 (this is something that she won't really understand for a while but she still enjoys playing with the shapes), a color blue Crayola puzzle that I picked up at the Dollar Store (again she can't put the puzzle together but it's fun to help her and then name all of the blue things in the picture), then I printed her the Brown Bear, Brown Bear Tot Pack from 1+1+1=1. She really enjoys the different activities in these packs. 

This was the first time that I tried graphing with her and she didn't understand it at all. So I just kept having her roll the die and we waited to see which animal would reach the top of the graph first, Bear won! She also filled in some of the dots, but I did most.
 



  One of the activities she loved the most and asked to do it all week was the Alphabet Art book from All Our Days. The letter B project was a band-aid page. Hannah is already obsessed with band-aids so she was sad that I only let her have 6 band-aids and one page. But she was able to unwrap them all and stick them on all by herself. She is a pro considering every time she hurts herself she runs to get a band-aid bleeding or not.





 The picture below is one of the most exciting moments of the week when out of the blue she can all of a sudden trace lines. These are not straight by any means but the fact that she finally saw the dotted line and made the connection is super exciting and satisfying to me. These are the moments I have glimpses of the future and think we'll be ok during this homeschool journey.


Danny helped with the markers, including marking all over one of our couch slipcovers in black. And of all of the markers Hannah uses these are not washable. It washed out a little, but that kind of stuff is going to happen during these years and probably forever so I really wasn't upset. Which I'm surprised at myself for.


Again I didn't get any pictures of the books we read, I am determined to remember that! But they include, The Jesus Storybook Bible, Do your ABC's, Little brown bear, Brown Bear (Suzi Eszterhas), If I were a ballerina, Ballerina Rosie, Ballerina! (Peter Sis), Scare a bear, Big brown bear's birthday surprise and Brown bear, brown bear.


In our Family Connections class at church we had the pleasure of hearing one of our main pastors speak to us about bible read throughs. He spoke of a new or rediscovered trend going around called Orality or Storying. The basis is; you read a story out loud and then have the people listening tell it back and have others fill in the blanks that the person telling it back missed. It is a way to memorize the story, make it your own and hopefully comprehend it better. It reminds me of what the Native-Americans or other ancient people did while sitting around the camp fire and telling stories of their ancestors. It really is a way to captivate an audience and bring them into the story. It is especially beneficial to people or children who cannot yet read or write. So our pastor suggested doing that with your children as a way to read through the bible. I was really happy when he brought this up because it's pretty much what we are doing when we are reading these Bible stories to our children. Having them tell it back to us or explain what happened is an awesome way for them to comprehend the story and memorize it more. The week before our pastor spoke on this Hannah was actually doing this with me with the Creation story. It was really exciting, she was recapping the story and finishing it for me. She even ran to get her Creation crafts to illustrate the sky that God created. This was another moment that I knew I was doing something right.



((linking up with Tot School Gathering Place at 1+1+1=1))

Working at Resting

 She watches over the affairs of her household and does not eat the bread of idleness. Proverbs 31:27

Lately, I've been really struggling with my priorities. Just like right now I should be cleaning or doing something important but I really feel the need to post this. Thanks to @nataliecreates over on Instagram with her Question of the Day: How do you prioritize self-care? or her blog Natalie Creates I really felt the need to talk about this.

I feel like I'm always trying to get my priorities in check or in balance. I know what they are and what order they come in but actually keeping it balanced all the time is a struggle. I don't think I am alone in this but in my mind I feel like I am. I feel like I'm the only one who doesn't have it together, no where near together. But thanks to Natalie's post I am reminded once more that most people don't have it together and if you think they do, there are probably other areas you don't see that they struggle with.

The older I get though the more comfortable I am getting with "things just are the way they are". I'm doing the best I can, to keep my family happy, me happy and sane. The house is just always going to be in a perpetual mess as long as I have a 3 year old and 16 month old trashing it. That's the way it's supposed to be right? Messy house means happy kids or so I'm told. There are days when I wake up and once diapers are changed and breakfast is doled out, usually whatever self-feeding food we have around I will just start cleaning. I won't shower or usually even change my clothes. I just clean clean clean, then the afternoon comes and I realize I stink, look horrible and feel horrible and the house still isn't the way I would like it and the areas that are nice won't be like that in a couple of hours. There are days when I feel like not even trying. The only area I really work on daily is the kitchen and without a dishwasher and no help it really is a chore. How did they do it back in the day? I realize they didn't have several electronics and blogs pulling them this way and that but I've tried days with no phone, computer or TV and it's still a huge struggle. The Greatest Generation is my favorite generation though I'm not a part of it but sometimes they make me feel bad. Not their fault and I'm sure there were plenty of families back then that didn't have it all together, you just don't see that on TV or in photos.

This post isn't about giving up though or feeling bad about things. It's just about sharing the truth and stating that I'm not giving up but I'm also not striving for perfection. It's about the fact that I can rest in Him and He doesn't care if my house is messy. He's that best friend that will come over for coffee amongst all of the mess and really talk about real things. He will rest my soul and remind me that all I need to focus on is Him and all else will fall into place.

"Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest".  Matthew 11:28


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Tot School - Pioneer/Farm / VeggieTales

The past two weeks title should really be Tot School or lack there of. I don't even know what happened during Pioneer week (the week before) but last week we had an off week to say the least. I didn't even get tot school set up until midweek. Our Sunday started off really rough with a 4 hour round trip drive which included Sissy getting car sick 15 minutes before arriving at our destination. Luckily Mama had a change of clothes & shoes, bags to put the yucky stuff in, lots of Wet Ones to help clean up and Lysol on the Go to help with the smell. This is the second time this has happened so we're pretty sure she gets car sick now and it's not just a fluke. So needless to say after a day like that we were exhausted when we got home and unfortunately that set up our week to be off.

But there was alot of Life School. We had a fun day of shopping including a trip to Ikea which the kids actually enjoy. Probably wouldn't be so fun if they didn't have the cafeteria. Then pretty much everyday was filled with VeggieTales, ALL DAY LONG. I know, I know I'm an awesome parent. But it was just one of those weeks and I will justify it with the lessons that VeggieTales teaches.

Despite all of this I did happen to catch some snap shots of learning and play.

Sissy enjoyed this Buckets of Buttons file folder game messy face and all. She didn't quite get it yet but if was fun anyways.



 Baby Guy was having some fun with the farm puzzle, tractor overalls and all.



Here he is learning to write. This really shocked me that he was actually writing.



Caught them red handed reading Daddy's book.


Posing in action. Don't you just love my vintage carpet. I really really love this about Baby Guys room.


The looks on those faces. Priceless.




 Well regardless of intentional schooling or time spent together, they are learning all of the time. Seeing them play together, which they are also doing right now, fills my heart with so much JOY. This is why He put me here in this place right now.


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Daring paths

End of summer reading.
Heavy thoughts.
Following new paths.
Trying to change old habits.
Thankful for new beginnings.
Knowing that the path will be long.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Excited for new views, new ideas.
New ways to show love to her and him. Realizing how I probably screwed up with the first, but also realizing how wonderful he is despite my lack of intention.




He finds me where I am and I am His

These songs both beautifully say what I would like to share in this blog.








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We've Decided to Homeschool!



So we've decided as a family to take the ever so scary first steps into homeschooling. I want to use this page to share, why, how and what we choose to do along the way as I'm sure the how and what will change as we go along.

First off I will start with the "why". Why would we choose to homeschool? Well, I can tell you that if you would have asked us 3 years ago; we would have said a big "NO" to homeschooling. The main reason being the ever so argued topic of "socialization", even though after looking into homeschooling deeper I realize there is no argument to socialization, these days it seems to be the problem that homeschool kids are almost too socialized with all of the activities, groups and co-ops they can be a part of. So that puts that to rest.

My husband was actually homeschooled and didn't really have a negative outlook on it other than his parents had to stop after his 7th grade year. For 8th grade he went to a Christian private school and then for high school he went to public school. He did feel like he had been thrown to the wolves so to speak because he had been very sheltered but of course we hope to not shelter the kids so much but if that's the worst thing that happens then so be it.

What brought us to even start considering homeschool? Well this is going to sound crazy, but it is what it is. We recently watched a movie called Agenda: Grinding America Down and our whole outlook changed. If you have not watched it I suggest you do. That mixed with the things my 12 year old tells me that they are teaching him at school pretty much started this homeschool train rolling. Unfortunately, I cannot pull my 12 year old out of school, long story, but I pray for him all the time, that God is with him and helping him make wise choices. He is God's before he is mine and I give him to God. But I can however control what happens with the next two that will be entering school age before I know it.

As soon as I told my mother-in-law that we were thinking about homeschooling she immediately found a book for me while at Goodwill. It took me a week or so to start reading it and I wish I would have started reading it sooner. The book, The Christian Home School by Gregg Harris was written originally in 1988 and then updated in 1995 and it speaks to everything Agenda: Grinding America Down covered. Let me just say our public school system has an a plan for the future of our children and I don't want my children to be a part of "that" future. As I was reading I just couldn't get over the fact that what he was saying is happening right now in our country before our eyes and then especially the people like Martin Luther who pretty much called the decline of this country through our schools back in the 1800's.

So my main goal for my children is to know God, have a personal relationship with Jesus and get a quality education along with that. Education is very important but knowing Jesus is more important, we're talking their eternal future here. Once I started looking more into homeschooling and what it has turned into these days compared to what it was when my husband was homeschooled, I got very excited. The possibilities are endless. As long as the government continues to allow homeschooling that's what we're going to do. However, I do realize that life changes and sometimes you have to roll with the punches so if something happened to us financially or if I were not able to be at home with the kids anymore and my only option was public school, I would just pray daily for my little ones. But hopefully that doesn't happen.

I want to be a godly woman, wife and mother and I want to raise my children to be godly people. My prayer is that through this decision we will glorify God by keeping our children close to us, teaching them Christian values and character and making their education our responsibility.



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Gendercide in America

This is an unusual post for me with serious topics and serious questions. But this is something I cannot ignore.

Did you know that right here in America people are choosing to abort their baby if the gender is undesirable? And that Planned Parenthood is supportive no matter why the individual decides to abort their baby?



Here is a question and really think about this....when is it ever okay to kill an innocent child? Just somethings to think about. If you want to help save our girls, let alone an innocent human life sign this petition.
These babies have no voice, will you be theirs?












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AHA

My thoughts lately have been on the truth...






















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He's here!

Hi Everybody,

I know it's been forever since I've last blogged but it has been for a good reason. My newest son Daniel Joseph is here! He arrived on April 27 and was six weeks early. He weighed 4 lbs 9 oz. and was 17 inches long. He had no complications other than he was six weeks early and little. He stayed 9 days in the NICU just to get his weight up and fight off some Jaundice.

He's two months old now and time is flying by. But as you can see I don't have much time for blogging or crafting for that matter. I do really want to get back to doing somethings but right now it's just too much. Hopefully in the fall I can start getting back to my hobbies. But in the meantime I'm enjoying being a mother to my three babies even though one of them is 12 now!

Here are some pictures of the little guy. He has gained weight like crazy since he's been home and is doing great.








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Encouraging Word Wednesday Week #6

It's pumpkin patch time, go spend some special time with your family. The memories will last forever.

Isaiah 22:24
All the glory of his family will hang on him: its offspring and offshoots—all its lesser vessels, from the bowls to all the jars.
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Encouraging Word Wednesday Week #5

This week will be another very quick post. I had a whole thing I was going to write but today is just too jam packed, so I wanted to get on here real quick to post something encouraging.



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